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I wrote that in past tense because I can no longer willingly go outside like I used to. You see, having cancer doesn't make anything easier, if anything, I've been cursed by the Tulip Gods or something.

Cursed to be tangled up in bed sheets everyday, and living in the same room, seeing the same old colors plague my vision. My day-to-day activities include reading, staring at the window, and now I can say with pride that writing is now apart of the very few things I do for amusement.

When I told my mother that I wanted a journal, she practically flipped.

She bought me five different journals, each varying in different sizes. I'm still currently on the first one, since I intend on taking my time with it. I'm in no rush in finishing this journal.

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In fact, I just started this journal today. My mother got them over a month ago and they been sitting in a corner gathering dust. It was impromptu, but I grabbed a pen and the biggest journal I had and started writing. I guess writing can become a tool for ranting and venting about my painfully boring lifestyle. Like the monotonous architecture that I'm used to seeing, my life has become just as dull.

Of course, the out of the ordinary experiences happen sometimes. My pet hamster, Sisyphus landed on his back while running on his small wheel, and yes if you couldn't tell because of his name, I enjoy learning about Greek mythology. I guess I find immortal gods fascinating, since the explanations for some of them are so intriguing.

However Sisyphus on the other hand is just a sad tale. A man who is cursed to push a boulder up a hill for all eternity only to watch it fall down as soon as he brought it up. One couldn't pity him though, it was his own foolery brought upon himself.

If he hadn't run his mouth, he wouldn't have gotten into so much trouble. The thing is, I'm the foolish girl who would pity such a man.

Seeing something spiral down into decent, even though you worked so hard to prevent it, it can be a damper on a soul. It wasn't like he could walk away either, he was forced to go through that constant torture. He experienced never ending agony, being placed to roll an over sized rock up a hill.

An Imperial Affliction

Maybe I'm projecting my own problems onto Sisyphus, and that's why I'm relating to him so much. Then again, naming your hamster after a Greek legend isn't considered connecting. If anything, I'm the one putting the curse onto my hamster.

Being called Sisyphus until the day he dies, isn't that just as important as the tale itself? I must learn to stop talking about such weird things I'm awfully strange.

But that's enough about talking in the past, let's proceed onto current events. A bird landed next to my window a little while ago, and that was interesting, It was a common blue jay, nothing too different, another thing that happened today was-.

I'm sorry to interrupt, but do you mind coming out here for a second? I close my diary instinctively, but I know she won't come into my room.

An imperial affliction peter van houten pdf

My mother has this thing where she allows privacy, since I get so little of it. As expected with trips to the hospital and other revealing things go. I slowly crawl out of my bed and hobble outside my door. My mother is a gardener, and of course she is absolutely obsessed with flowers. I'm highly grateful that I'm not allergic to pollen, because my sinuses would be a constant chore all year round. I don't think that my mother's obsession will die out any time soon, she simply can't get enough of floral.

My house is filled with windows, so that the flowers can grow. That means that natural light is always seeking it's way into my home. I shield my eyes from the luminous light and slowly creep my way to my back porch. More often than not, my mother is always situated in the backyard, tending to our overgrown garden. Of course as expected, it is filled to the brim with tulips.

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All different colors combine together. The word I would use to describe the garden is vibrant. You simply can't look away from it. I'll admit, it is very nice to look at, and my mother did put her blood, sweat, and tears into her gardening. That doesn't mean she isn't crazy, she still is.

A love for flowers is simple, a crazed love for tulips is out of hand. Nothing is planted in our garden other than tulips, so it could get pretty sickening after a while. The scent of them aren't too pleasant either.

Exposing yourself to them for too long could cause a headache. I should know since my own personal experience with my mother's garden included a pounding migraine.

An Imperial Affliction

I open the slider door, and take a step out. The wooden deck feels warm underneath my feet. I carefully tiptoe around it, since I'm somewhat paranoid I'll get a splinter in my foot. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to step outside barefoot, but I don't think too far in advance.

I could say that for my whole life, since I wasn't expecting cancer to knock me right off my feet, but that could be said for anything. I found my mother sitting next to her tulip flowerbed. Green, it could be argued, took his to the next level: Peter Van Houten is a crucial character in The Fault In Our Stars , and "his" words don't just kick off the book then disappear — both his thematic and his physical presence is felt throughout the entire story.

He plays a huge role in one of the book's themes, and one that often gets overshadowed by its larger dealings with death and romantic love: The love one has with a story — or with the author who created that story. In that way Van Houten serves both as a proxy and a foil for Green's persona.

I mean: 1. Happily, I am not an alcoholic. Sadly, I do not have an assistant, let alone a beautiful Dutch assistant.

I am not particularly reclusive. I hope that I do not use pomposity and pretension to shield myself from trauma. Most of the bad things that have happened to Peter Van Houten have not happened to me.

I am somewhat younger than he is.My mother noticed my silence and she became concerned. Other editions. Mar 15, Karina rated it it was amazing. My name is Anna. I was going to say, why not spend sometime outside? My mother has this thing where she allows privacy, since I get so little of it. Audio Interfaces are available that have several mic preamps on board.

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